The Human Struggle

READING FROM BOTTOM UP:


11-13-2010 -- 1:22 pm 114 -- YIPPEE!

AFTER EATING A RAW SALAD FOR BREAKFAST
11-13-2010 -- 12:08 pm 128

AFTER EATING 2 SPOONS OF CHIA GEL, ONE OLIVE
11-13-2010 -- 11:22 am 123

AFTERWARDS, WENT TO FELLOWSHIP, ATE MEAT DISH
11-12-2010 -- 5:22 pm 112 (YESTERDAY)

Hi,

I was alarmed this morning when my morning blood sugar was 123. I had taken some chia seed gel and had eaten an olive -- so I guess it was not really a true fasting blood sugar (and I suspect my meter has not made the time change so the time is also off). Perhaps that is why it was so high. But I also wonder if it was not what I ate last night at Sweet Fellowship.  

I had prepared and taken a nice fresh raw salad trying to remember that other people are not used to the combinations I eat so I put in some olives, feta cheese, tomato and avocado (which is normal for me anyway) plus my normal spices and olive oil. I took along some fresh lime pieces to squeeze over the salad as it was served.

The hostess had made a Scandinavian type meatball dish with mushrooms and white gravy which she served over noodles. When she plated mine, she left out the noodles, knowing that I don't eat them. She gave me more than I would have taken myself. I did not count them but I would guess there was about five meatballs, a few mushroom pieces and half to three quarters cup of gravy. I filled the rest of the large plate with salad and ate. I wanted to see if the others liked my salad so I kind of watched the eaters. There was only four of us, including the hostess' 12 year old son who came in a little late and ate with us.

I ate and was satisfied. I noticed that the hostess took some of the salad but must not have liked the flavors because she went to the kitchen and put some of the gravy from the meat dish on her salad as dressing. I did not think anything of that other than to realize she was making the flavor match what she needed. I thought it was interesting.

But I wonder if my having eaten the cooked dish with the gravy and probably some grain in the meat balls was what influenced my blood sugars up this morning. You would not think it would make such a difference. I obviously did not think there was anything wrong with partaking in this way, because I did it with only minor reservations. I knew it was not perfect, but also knew I do eat meat from time to time, so I partook. Then had high blood sugars this morning. Granted 123 is not super high, but I kind of like my "teen" numbers. Just to assuage my soul, I checked to see what my average blood sugar has been for the last 7, 14, and 30 days that are recorded and it was 115 consistently on all of them. That includes this morning -- so, OK, that was higher than the 112 for which I was hoping, but still, not so bad. Good even.

I got out the "Simply Raw" DVD and watched it again. There seems to be something small said about eating cooked meat that Dr Cousins believes contributes to diabetes in some way. Maybe that is why I've not been able to get my blood sugars down to the normal "88" average. Maybe that will happen in the not too distant future, but for now my body is hanging on to the sugar levels.

I shall just keep on keeping on and am not going to "sound the alarm" yet. It said in the video that a blood sugar of less than 120 after eating was normal, so I am very very close. I am hoping that as I continue and then go to the doctor in December that I will have some extreme improvements in my blood tests. Especially after sticking to it for that amount of time.

One of the things that was brought home to me in the video was to see the emotional struggles that the participants went through. One lady who is large like me was very distressed in the beginning because her blood sugars simply did not come down as fast as the other participants. They had all gone down to pretty low numbers and she was still at 400 and very discouraged. She wanted to quit and go home, but she decided to stay and stick it out for the 30 days and soon her blood sugar numbers were where mine are right now.

This lady shared at one point how much she just wanted some cheeze crackers and was even describing them in detail. She really wanted those crackers. You could tell that was a really powerful craving she was having, but she got through it without cheating and got to the point of better blood sugars.

One man actually left the program due to the emotional struggle. His blood sugars had gone down, his blood pressure had gone down, and physically he was in much better shape than when he arrived, but one morning he felt sick, almost like the flu. He would not eat because of how his stomach felt and ended up calling his cousin to come pick him up and he did not complete the program. I thought it was interesting that his cousin was actually much bigger than he was in weight. He also refused to think that what his feelings were telling him was anything but the truth. I understand, but I also take note.

I already know that our feelings do not always tell us the truth -- especially when they are in "reactive" mode. What our feelings tell us is how we feel, and that may or may not have anything to do with "the truth."  They do not even tell us what we are capable of (a future event), they only tell us how we feel (a past event). I believe, also that our feelings come from our thoughts. If you ever pay attention, every feeling you ever get, comes on the heals of a thought that has just gone through your mind. It is almost like, our feelings are a result of our thinking habits. I learned this from having dealt with lots of fear and anxiety in my past. This is also one of the reasons I believe so strongly in the Bible and in Jesus Christ. It is not the only reason, but it is a strong one.

For me, the Bible is a manual for life. It is more than that, too. It is the Word of God to His children whom He wants back. God loves us and wants us to live with Him, so He gave us His word to guide us to Him. The more you know God, the more you know about Him, who He is, what He is like, the more you know yourself. You can trust in His word, and know that His word is powerful, and you do not need to be afraid of, nor run by, your feelings. You cannot live, separate from God, and you cannot separate from your own feelings, but the more you trust God, the better you feel. Amen!!

In the video, during this segment, they showed clips of a man talking about the struggle that goes on when we try to make changes in our lives. My blog is full of that struggle. That is probably more of what my blog is about than anything else. My struggle to do what I believe is right for my physical body. I share the lessons I am learning from the "experts." I share how I implement, or failed at implementing, that advice. I am, slowly, finding the parameters that work for my body to be healthy. I am finding that if I find what works and continue to do it, it continues to work.

As I read of other people who have struggles in some way to change their lives for the better, I am learning from their struggles. For instance: As I watched the DVD "Simply Raw" for the second time, I tuned in more to the individual struggles. Each person has their own struggles. One man struggled with not only type 1 diabetes but alcoholism. At one point he left the enclave, against good and earnest advice otherwise, and went drinking. But what did he do? He came back. He finished the program, changed his eating habits, and reduced his insulin intake to one fifth of what he had been taking. Later it said he was sometimes preparing raw food meals for his family.

Of the six people who started the experiment, for that is what it was, an experiment in reversing diabetes, one man gave up and quit. One man, gave up, quit, and came back within five hours. One woman almost quit, but decided to stay. The other three did not share what their particular emotional struggle was. They simply persevered, kept their minds open, and obediently did what they were told -- and completed the program successfully. Every person who started out, improved their health during the experiment, even the man who completely quit. Every person was changed in some way. All made physically healthy improvements, but one succumbed to his feelings and quit. Two struggled and teetered with their reactions, but did not let them rob themselves of fulfilling their desire to be healthy. Three simply saw the improvements and rejoiced in them, later making significant changes in their lives and their communities. One even decided to become a doctor so he can help others do the same thing he did.

Hope you are making good changes and seeing good results for your body and soul, too. Don't let your struggles, and your feelings, lead you in the wrong direction. Keep looking at the truth, and following after it. If you are looking for truth, you will find it. If you are not looking for truth, you will not recognize it.

One of the things about diabetes and the standard American diet is that it comes with a mind set. The mind set is self indulgence. That is the thing that I struggled with. It still rises up in me, but the longer I am successful at incorporating the change, the easier it is becoming to stick to it. Sounds like I think I am past the struggles. I am not going to let that fool me. Please don't let it fool you, either. Each day has its own struggle, but if you keep refocusing your eyes on the truth, you can keep getting up and going for it.

I trust in the Lord, and the food He made and believe that He and His food, raw, organic, food that is still in the state that He created it, is the best thing for our bodies. Our bodies are raw and natural. Seems like raw and natural food would obviously be the best thing for them. Living food, for living bodies.

Love you,

Be back soon,
--Marcia